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Post by Derrek on Jul 6, 2017 6:59:13 GMT
Derrek was starving.
Or rather, Tytus was starving.
He had changed his name when his hatred towards humans began. It was a way for him to drop his old life, forget about the person that he used to be. When Tytus was Derrek the human, or Derrek the sad self-pitying turned shifter, he was soft and merciful. He cared so much about everyone about him and tried so hard to make them all happy, but they all left in the end. The kid he had tried to raise, the widow he had tried to love. All of that was in the past, and he was different now. More angry, unpredictable. In many ways, he was more similar to a daemon with his change in attitude and personality than a shifter. Much of that had to do with the influence being in his true and half form all of the time. It’d been months since he’d last been a human.
Tytus spent a lot of his time within the Cliffs of Haven. For a time, he had stayed on the outskirts, but eventually strayed further into the cliffs, away from any prying travelers. Even though he had yet to ever do it, the shifter noticed more than once he had the urge to kill and eat any travelers that came by. So he shuffled away into hiding. There was no need to do any work since he was content with the way he lived.
His new home was a cave with a complex network of connecting caves. Tytus hadn’t explored them much yet, but he suspected they went deep into the cliffs, leading to other cave entrances elsewhere. Though lonely, the cave was quite beautiful. The stone that shaped it was a dark dusky grey with interwoven shades of red and blue. It had a glossy shine to it and anytime the sun shone in it, the cave sparkled like a gem. At night, the bioluminescent fungi and cave plants lit it up with blues and greens, enough to give the same visibility as the day.
Midday was bleak and weary. Thunder stormed the black sky while rain fell heavy onto the floor. A flash of lightning would flash here and there. There was enough light for visibility, but there was a groggy film to it, or rather an obvious lack of sunlight. It was still the day, but thanks to the low lightening, some of the bioluminescent plants held a dull glow.
Tytus was in his draconic, burly half form. He was much taller than any human, daemon, shifter, or fae. His neck alone was as thick as a tree trunk lined with thick muscle and hide. Every step he took with his digitgrade legs made a ‘thud’ from his sheer heavy weight. The weakest point of his body, his wings, were roughly tucked against his back. The only time he used them was to hunt, but even then they weren’t all that helpful. His half form was built like a bull, nothing but muscle and strength. The wings could lift him off the ground some and carry him a little too, but not for long.
Part of the influence of his true form was his found love for raw animal flesh. The storm hadn’t affected his need to hunt and earlier he managed to nab one of gryphons separated from its flock. It was grounded from the high winds and heavy rain, and Tytus managed to kill it quickly.
He was dripping with water as he entered his cave, his heavy, dull gold tail trailing behind as he dragged the gryphon by its wing. The blood of the gryphon smeared onto the cave floor, but he didn’t care about tidiness anymore. Hell, he didn’t even wear clothes since all they did was tear. It wasn’t like his half form or true form had any obvious genitalia like mammals though, so it never bothered him much, nor was there anyone around to really be a judge.
Tytus dropped the gryphon to the floor and grunted. Everything seemed so backwards to him, but he didn’t mind. There was a sort of tranquility to his new lifestyle, an almost peaceful bliss. He knelt down onto his knees and, using the sharp talons at the ends of his fingers, began gutting the gryphon. Once the gut was exposed, he pulled out the intestines first, followed by the stomach and other organs he was not fond of eating.
His favorite was the heart, and he first tore that out. The teeth around his mouth were openly exposed and visible, used only for tearing flesh. There was no need to chew as he took a chunk out of the beast’s heart, because he swallowed the chunk whole followed by the rest of the heart. Hands and mouth stained with blood, he tore off the hind leg of the animal and began devouring it next, ignoring the fur.
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Post by Matthias on Jul 6, 2017 8:31:52 GMT
Pontius staggered into the cave, blinking hard even as the rain stopped blasting him in the eyes. In just a few seconds he had been drenched and the solid earth under his feet had turned to mud. He would have fallen off the cliff completely if Matthias hadn't had such huge claws for gripping and managed not to budge an inch when he grabbed the back of the shifter's collar. But even Matthias' clawed feet couldn't withstand the mudslide that sent both of them bolting down the narrow cliff path and into the first cave they found.
“I hate you,” Pontiu wheezed. He put his hands on his knees and doubled over, gasping for air. “I hate you so fucking much.” He glared up just as Matthias started vigorously fluffing water out of his hair and spattered the shifter in a second mist of water but Pontius was too exhausted to tell him off for that. “We could have stayed at that nice lady's house but noooooo. 'We're climbing those fucking cliffs again, Russ, 'cause I got a hard-on for this hot dragon chick!'”
“Oh, you thought she was hot too?”
“Fuck off.” How was Matthias not winded too? Pontius wheezed before he just let his legs give out and sat down heavily. He felt hot and cold all at once and it felt like his heart was trying to escape his ribs.
“You're a lumber slave, how are you so out of shape?”
Pontius glared up, but was surprised to see that Matthias had sunk to all fours and was leaning close to him. “Okay, dick, do you think I knocked over trees by running at them?” Matthias leaned in closer, putting his hands on the rock floor on either side of Pontius' hips even as the shifter leaned back. “You were there, my legs were chained together-”
“That was a good look for you.”
“-You think I could run li- wait what the fuck was that?”
Matthias leaned in close enough to kiss him, and he rolled his spine from the force of it. He was already dry, how unfair was that? Matthias never wore a shirt anymore so he could use his tattoos and wings more freely, and dragon blood burned like fire. He still kissed the stoic bastard right back, pulling him so rough and close that their teeth clinked together. It was messy and wet, a certain hunger in the motion of their tongues against each others lips.
It was really no surprise that Pontius pulled back first, gasping for air again. But it was then that he heard something deeper in the cave. Wet snapping and chewing. Faint, and just for a second, but it was enough for him to shift into his true form and his ears perked up on his head as his small nose twitched.
“Ezer,” he hissed, “something else is in here.”
“Like a bat? Cause we're in a cave-”
“No! Like a bear or-”
“Oh, that's actually kind of flattering.”
“No, not you, you idiot, like an actual fucking bear!”
“Well. We're in a cave-”
“EZER.TAKE.CARE.OF.THE.FUCKING.BEAR!”
Matthias rolled his eyes but still got back to his feet easily enough. He took a deep breath and faced the inside of the cave before he roared. His roars were getting more and more draconic and his ripped through old rock. He sounded like a proper dragon, and few creatures were willing to go toe to toe with a dragon. Even so, Matthias pulled his tattoo of Derrek's sword off his shoulder and raised it in case something charged him.
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Post by Derrek on Jul 7, 2017 1:43:20 GMT
Tytus was enjoying his meal, lost in the savory, yet gamy meat of the lion-bird hybrid. When he first heard the sounds of invaders, his head had been shoved practically into the animal as he ripped and tore at the remaining meat on it. The talking was muffled, and at first he didn’t think much of it. It was when he heard the roar that he poked his head up from the carcass, mostly covered in dried blood, and glared from the direction that it came from. The roar echoed further and further down the cave from its sheer loudness. It was a distinct sound. After living in the cliffs for so long, he’d come to distinguish different animal sounds from others, and this one he heard quite often. There were many large, flying reptiles all over the cliffs, many of which he’d never seen. Reptiles had a very distinct and different sound than mammal roars, so he knew that much.
For all he knew, it was just an animal. Steam flared up through his nostrils. Many thought dragons could only breathe fire or ice, but Tytus emitted searing hot steam. Half the water he drank was always stored away in his body and never used till he shot it out. The water would impact with another organ in his body that did actually emit flame, but the flame always met with the water and thus produced steam at an incredibly high temperature, it was enough to melt flesh off of bone.
He extended his wings and flapped them a few times as he stood up, grunting snarling. He took a step forward and gave his own roar back, something louder and deeper as his vocal cords were almost completely that of his true form. If it was an animal, his roar usually scared it off. It could incite a challenge, but he’d yet to meet something that formidable where he lived, especially with the bad weather that there was.
Tytus tore another chunk of meat off and swallowed it. It was safer to check that the creature had left before continuing to eat. Again he grunted as he moved in the direction of the roar, the echoes of his steps melding with the echoes of rain drops.
He had not been far from the entrance, but as he got closer he could make out the two indistinguishable shapes of people. The lighting was too dark and murky for him to make out their faces, but he didn’t care. Lucky for them, he just ate.
This time he snarled and growled directly towards them, taking one more step before flaring his wings and tucking them in again. “Leave. Now.” In his half-form, Tytus’ voice was very deformed from his human voice. It was deep and scratchy, sometimes mixed with a deep throat grumble. If they were human, they’d have once chance to get out. If not…well…Tytus didn’t want to argue. He detested most people now, especially when they invaded his home.
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Post by Matthias on Jul 7, 2017 8:35:13 GMT
Agitation drew across Matthias' face when his roar was answered by an even deeper one. He didn't move as some creature shifted in the darkness and lumbered forward. What did surprise him was that it looked relatively humanoid. Great. Fighting off people was always worse than fighting off animals.
“Oh he seems like a nice, friendly fellow,” Pontius said flatly as he lurched to his feet. Matthias widened his stance, shifting so that he stood protectively in front of the shifter and the spines on his tail began to rattle together like a rattle snake, a dry sound of bone on bone. He wasn't afraid, and why should he be? Unless the lizard guy managed to behead him entirely in one go he would find it next to impossible to kill him.
Thunder cracked outside the cave as the dragon spoke, and Matthias didn't need to look outside to know rain and hail was falling in sheets. They had barely gotten away from a mudslide and there were bound to be more. “Sorry, we can't do that,” Matthias said. “Rather not die and-” he raised is sword and turned the blade to the humanoid. “- I'm pretty confident with our chances in here. That won't be a problem, will it?”
“Yeah! Fuck 'em up!” Pontius punched the air behind Matthias, clearly missing the mood Matthias was going for. The halfie shut his eyes and sighed before he composed himself again.
“Yeah, like the idiot says,” Matthias said flatly, ignoring the loud 'HEY!' from behind him.
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Post by Derrek on Jul 7, 2017 22:27:36 GMT
A groan of irritation escaped from Tytus when it became clear that the intruders didn’t want to leave and the one who made the roar, and now some silly rattling sound, was trying to threaten Tyutus in his own home. What a fucking headache. He took another step closer, snarling as a way to express said irritation. Amusingly he snorted at the retorts. Whoever they were, they weren’t afraid of the way he looked which was kind of new. “You're both idiots. In my home. It’s just some fucking rain, it won’t hurt you.” The lightening would, maybe. And perhaps what the rain caused would hurt them, but that wasn’t really Tytus’ problem now, was it?
He was just about to charge at the two pests till one of them drew a sword, a very familiar sword at that. It made him pause, gaining control of his animal-like actions. There was…no, it couldn’t been. Derrek used to have a sword just like the one that was held in the stranger’s hands. It wasn’t just similar, it was an exact replica from what he could tell. It was a gladius sword, awarded to him when he got his first command unit as a Hound. But he’d gotten rid of it ages ago…how?
Something stirred within Tytus and he shuffled to the side so that there was better light to see the intruders with. One of them, the ‘idiot’ so called, was not familiar at all. He didn’t seem like much to begin with, just some kid. But the other one….he made Tytus stop in his tracks.
There were many differences, but there were also a lot of familiarities. All the dragon parts were identical to how he remembered them, but the boy and face they were attached to just seemed so…different, so grown up.
As he studied the boy’s face, there was an echoing deep rumble in the back of his throat. The familiar face churned up memories he had no desire to remember or think on. They were all things he’d force himself to ignore and store away. But he couldn’t help himself, the shifter had to now.
Hesitantly he called out to the boy. “No fucking way. Matthy? Is that you?” The shock was not an act, and it was real, but there was a hint of anger behind the deep scratchy voice that came from Tytus’s big maw. He…was sort of at a loss on what to do. Part of him still wanted to throw them outside, but he was too curious now. He had to know.
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Post by Matthias on Jul 8, 2017 0:09:14 GMT
“It's a cave, you can't own a cave,” Matthias said flatly. Then he blinked and glanced at Pontius, “can you?”
“Fuck, man, I don't know. It's not the weirdest shit anyone's said.”
“Okay well, we're unclear on how cave ownership works but,” Matthias said,“I'm more worried about the mudslides than the rain. And you, for that matter.”
He was unsure what made the guy hold back, but Matthias didn't get the impression that his aggression had lessened at all so he remained ready to fight. Seriously, though, what was up with the guy's stare? It was starting to make Matthias' skin crawl and if Pontius hadn't been standing behind him he would have backed up just from the intensity of it. His thick tail slid over the ground, rattling even louder as he hunched his shoulder's, fully prepared to attack at the first hint of real aggression.
But, much to his surprise, the guy called out to him, using some unfamiliar bastardization of his first name. “My name's Ezer,” he said, more out of habit than anything else because he was stunned that this guy knew who he was. Matthias was fairly certain he had never met anyone who looked like him, but just to be safe . . .
Matthias raised two fingers to his mouth and whistled a shrill, quick tune. High, low, mid, mid.
Pontius lurched out of the way just in time to miss a blur of emerald before the Quetzalcoatl was beside Matthias. He was big enough that, while reared up, he was nearly two feet taller than Matthias and his head was huge enough to make it so he could easily swallow a person whole. His brilliantly colored feather crown was fully on display and his wings were down so his thumb joints touched the ground and supported him.
The snake's tongue flitted out between his teeth once then he paused. He flicked out his tongue again, then a third time.
Then he made a hissing noise that meant, roughly, 'the scent is familiar, but too different from what it was to place'. Anoki hissed, as two great fangs swung down from the roof of his mouth, already wet and dripping with poison.
“Okay, so, who are you?” Matthias asked, even more on edge than before after his snake's reaction.
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Post by Derrek on Jul 8, 2017 0:58:04 GMT
Tytus laughed, more so at himself than at the boys. When he stated his name was Ezer, it almost confirmed what he had feared. Back when he first met Matthias, he had given his name as Ezer then too. It was only later that he learned the boy’s true name. Had it really been so many years since he’d seen the kid? Well, not so much a kid now. He looked much older, much more of an adult than the teenager Tytus remembered. The chance of the boy pouncing at the shifter didn’t phase him.
Nor did he flinch when the giant ass snake appeared seemingly out of nowhere. Tytus was much bigger in his half-form than his human form, standing at a solid ten feet in height. His shoulders alone were almost twice the size of those in his human form. The only thing that maybe worried him a little was the length of the feathered snake and, perhaps, its level of agility. Tytu’s true form could easily squish it too, but he wouldn’t risk doing that in a tiny cave. It’d be seriously cramped.
The serpent’s appearance only confirmed who the boy was even more. Again, Tytus laughed and lowered his levels of hostility to almost none, though just in case he stayed on guard. Obviously, Matthias had no idea who he was.
With a snort of steam, he relaxed his shoulders and took step to the side, continuing to study the boy, his friend, and the snake. What to do, what to do. What would be easiest for him would be to still get rid of them, get them out of the cave and just forget he ever met them. Part of him considered to even just lie about who he was or apologize for ‘mistaking him’ for someone.
Tytuts didn’t move again, but he did sigh. “Put your damn sword down. I’d rather not turn into my true form and squish everyone and get stuck all at the same time, yeah?” It was less of a threat and more of a matter of fact statement. Tytus was a different man. If Matthias had decided to charge, he would have no choice but to retaliate. He was past pleasantries.
The tip of his heavy tail flicked around anxiously. “First of all, yes I can own the cave. Because I kill anyone that comes in it. Second, no you’re not ‘Ezer’. Your real name is Matthias, but you prefer a shortened version. And last, I’m…” he hesitated, having not called himself by his actual name in a long time. “Derrek,” he finished.
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Post by Matthias on Jul 8, 2017 8:18:18 GMT
Something about the way the man was laughing made Matthias' teeth itch and he glared. He hadn't been on edge but as more time passed he was getting more and more uneasy. He didn't know why, not really, but he knew he hated it and that the stranger was the source of it.
He wasn't an idiot. His sword didn't go anywhere when he was told to put it down.
How did this guy know him? Everything about this was starting to freak Matthias out and he could feel his heart starting to race in his throat.
Even still, when the man said Matthias' name he couldn't help but reaffirm, “it's Ezer.”
Almost at the exact time Pontius said, “he's Ezer.”
A sense of dread settled over him, though, as the stranger explained all these things about Matthias that he knew. That he shouldn't have known.
And when the man said he was Derrek his blood turned to ice. It felt like his racing heart had stopped dead and he couldn't breathe. Wordlessly, Matthias turned his sword at himself and ran it into his stomach. But instead of stabbing him as the blade touched his skin it turned to ink and slid around his torso as a tattoo.
“I . . . thought you'd died,” he said. His voice was devoid of all emotion and Pontius imitated him, his face turning to stone as well but he reached over and caught Matthias' hand, knitting their fingers together. Derrek had come up when Matthias told him what had happened and he was relieved to know the gesture was appreciated when the half-dragon squeezed his hand back. Matthias' eyes flickered around the cave before his gaze landed on Derrek once more. “Is this where you've been all this time? Camping out in the cliffs? Rosalind said you had a good reason for vanishing, guess this was it, huh?”
He narrowed his eyes, although his tone lacked venom.
Matthias shrugged his shoulder in Pontius' direction as he said, “this is Russ. He's the guy I'm fucking.”
“Wh-EZER!” Pontius hissed in his ear as he turned scarlet.
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Post by Derrek on Jul 9, 2017 4:25:30 GMT
Tytus was completely clueless on how Matthias would react. He wasn’t sure if he was fearful or just didn’t care, two completely different spectrum of feeling that he could feel in retaliation to how Matthias responded. When the boy seemed to understand and realize who Tytus was, his demeanor changed. It was familiar to the shifter, but not necessarily in a positive way. The blank look and emotionless tone reminded him of the first time he met Matthias, as well as the first few months he took care of the boy. Back then, he’d never figured out why the boy acted that way, and it was mostly the same now.
He snorted and crossed his massive arms. “Same could be said of you. I thought you were dead too, kid.” The shifter’s own tone had just the slightest hint of aggression behind it mixed with surprised and confusion. His own emotions were a mix of….everything. Tytus didn’t know how he should feel or react.
Trying to not take the comment regarding his disappearance as offensive, he responded. “Yes and no. I look for you for a long time. But I was obsessed with pitying myself and eventually I gave up. Probably should have died, honestly. Looked for ‘the meaning of life’ blah blah. Took a long time for me to get over myself and THEN I started camping out in the cliffs. Mostly as a dragon though. Haven't been in my human form for months.” He waved his clawed hand in the air. “Take that how you will. It’s not an excuse, it’s just what happened.” Tytus didn’t mean to sound so dismissive about it all, but it was done and nothing could change that. He had searched for Matthias, like he said, and failed to find him. After accepting that the kid was most likely dead, he moped in a puddle of self-pity before basically getting over it.
When the other kid had laced his hands with Matthias’s, Tytus paid no heed. He already assumed that meant they were a thing, but he wasn’t sure he really cared all that much. But when Matthias openly proclaimed their relationship in such a matter-of-fact tone, Tyuts choked a bit on air. Just like the now tomato-faced kid, if he had been in his human form, Tytus would have been a bright cherry read. Thank the gods in his half-form there was no fluctuation of color based on blood rushing to his face.
He cleared his throat and stumbled a bit on his words. “Uh, I’m happy for you? It’s good you found someone to be with. Better than doing whatever you’ve been doing out there all on your own I suppose.”
With such an awkward reunion, the shifter wasn’t sure what to do, really. There was no need for him to kick them out, but it was all just so…fast and weird. He motioned further down the cave with his wing and offered, “You still eat meat all the time? I’ve got a freshly killed gryphon if you, er, want.some….”
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Post by Matthias on Jul 11, 2017 7:35:52 GMT
Matthias ran his clawed thumb gently on Pontius' hand as they pressed their fingertips together. His face was unreadable, and unless Derrek had gained the ability to hear his thundering heart he wouldn't be able to tell what Matthias was thinking. Pontius could, though. The way their hands were entwined meant the could feel one another's pulses.
“You did?” Matthias asked. “I visit Rosalind pretty regularly, she has five houses but I'm pretty good at tracking her down. I kept going to the last place I saw you, your old house, and Irene's house too.” So how were you trying to look for me, Derrek? He didn't say it but damned if he didn't think it.
Matthias lowered his chin and glanced around. “So. Why the cliffs? What made you pick . . . this particular cave?” There was only the barest hint of disdain in his voice. His heartbeat was irregular and Pontius squeezed his hand back. “Hey, Derrek? I don't know if I ever told you but Rosalind is the most amazing person I've ever met. It's not just because she's the first person who was kind to me, she's kind to everyone. I don't know how she does it, but her doors are always open. It's incredible, don't you think? That's actually what I liked about you, too. You cared too, and you tried to help me. You opened your home to me.”
His gray eyes were so often empty and dead but when he looked at Derrek they were brilliant. “How long have you been terrorizing lost travelers looking for shelter? If it wasn't me, Derrek, would you have killed Russ for hiding in here? Or would you have just chased him out into the storm? Hey, Derrek, how many people have died because of you?”
He looked down, and studied Pontius out of the corner of his eye. He was beautiful, all dark skin and darker freckles and his profile was sharp. Dramatic. He was weak, physically, but the sight of him made him breathe.
“I'd rather not see how you've been eating, thanks,” Matthias said. His eyes looked like dead fish eyes when he looked at Derrek again. “A gryphon . . ? Are you eating your pet?”
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Post by Derrek on Jul 11, 2017 8:10:15 GMT
Tytus…or rather in this regards, he was being referred to as Derrek again, wasn’t really sure how to take in the obvious comparison of himself to Rosalind. Even if there was no expression in Matthias’s eyes or emotion in his tone of voice, Derrek was positive it was meant to irk or hurt him. That’s at least how he took it, and his stilted eyes narrowed. His anger was a lot more difficult to keep in check.
But then there was a sort of fire to The boy’s eyes as he interrogated the dragon shifter. Taken aback, he let his arms fall down to his side from the sheer shock of the reality of what Matthias said. There was a silence that felt like forever. For a moment, Derrek could feel something he hadn’t felt in a long time, almost like remorse or regret. And just for a second, he wondered if he could beg for Matthias’ forgiveness. The boy had been like a son to Derrek, but it was obvious long ago he was not fit to take care of anyone.
That second passed however, and he pushed those feelings back to where he buried them before. If he accepted them, then he’d have to accept everything else about him before he changed, like his time of weakness. He couldn’t do it.
Finally he mustered up something to say. “Don’t even bring up Irene.” She’d given up on him, just like everyone else, and Derrek’s eyes actually broke eye contact with Matthias as he said this, acting like he had no emotions about her, but it was all a lie. “Rosalind helped me too when…I was in a low place.” Right when he had debating about killing himself too, but he left that out. When it came to Matthias’s boyfriend, Russ so called, he wasn’t really sure how to respond. “And I wouldn’t…I don’t kn-.”
Derrek stopped. He suddenly felt enraged. Why was he the only one in the wrong here? Why was he getting scolded, but a child, for figuring out how to deal with his new life? He tried to keep the anger out of his tone of voice, but he failed. “Fuck it, I won’t sugar coat it. Yes, I would have sent him back out or killed him, just like any other stranger. I don’t make friends or trust people anymore, kid.” When he needed help most, there’d been next to no one to help him, or it at least felt that way. “I don’t know how many people I’ve killed because I don’t give a shit.” Steam was rising from his nostrils as a faster rate as his voice only became louder. “What do you want me to say? That I’m sorry for not being a pathetic piece of shit that wanted to die? That I regret what I’ve done? Because I don’t. My only regret, if any, was that I didn’t have the balls to face you after I tried to die.” Emotions running high, Derrek wasn’t sure what to say and if it was the right or wrong thing.
“Be pissed at me, or hate me or whatever. Irene does, all the people from my old life do. Hell, I bet…Russ was it? Probably hates me to. But that’s fine, because I’ve learned to cope.” Was this really coping? He didn’t want to think about it. Derrek was more reassuring himself than Matthias.
“And no, I’m not eating my pet. My gryphon got tired of me not being human, just like the human army, and decided to try and kill me. So he’s dead, but not eaten.” Derrek was a mess. Matthias being there was riling up so many emotions and thoughts that the shifter had shoved away from so long. It was so frustrating.
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Post by Matthias on Jul 12, 2017 10:24:44 GMT
Pontius flinched when Derrek spoke with an angrier voice, unable to help himself. Matthias himself felt a sting of terror but he didn’t show it outside of a sudden irregular breath. Matthias started to scold himself because this was Derrek, not a slaver.
But. . . Matthias wasn’t actually sure that meant anything anymore. Derrek didn’t own slaves but he would have killed Pontius, given the chance.
Derrek wasn’t a good person. Not anymore, it seemed.
“I guess I don’t really get it,” he said. He was speaking in an even and low voice, picking his words more carefully now as he grew more wary of the man standing over them.
“You were so loyal to everything humans we’re for all your life. And now you aren’t because, what? You were treated differently? Derrek, you always knew humans did that. Humans almost always hate shifters - you did too until I took you to Rosalind. That’s how humans are. You knew that. Or is it just because it’s happening to you?”
“Ezer…”
But Matthias ignored Pontius’ growing agitation. “You aren’t special for wanting to die, Derrek. I’ve never met a slave who hasn’t considered killing themselves, but we don’t get the luxury of throwing a tantrum about it. I always thought you were strong, but I guess that’s because you never had to deal with anything challenging before, huh? But as soon as being kind takes real, actual effort you aren’t up for it. Was every nice thing you ever did in your life just to make you feel better? Did you ever actually care about anyone?”
“Ezer, maybe tone it down a little . . ?”
Matthias was not going to tone down jack shit. If anything, talking was just making him more frustrated. He had never thought of himself as a good person, for all his early life he had been a slave and then it had taken him years to recover from the brain damage he had suffered. Hells, even now he still sometimes stopped functioning properly. But when he thought about it, the only people he had killed had been his and Pontius’ master and the overseer who had been whipping a chained line of lumber slaves. He couldn’t remember if anyone had died because of his negligence, but if they had it was when his brain was scrambling and not because he made a choice. Why had he spent so long thinking Derrek was a better person than him? Matthias bit the inside of his cheek until he tasted his own fire laced blood - just for a moment before it healed shut.
“Uhhhh, 'fraid I'm ambivalent on the whole hating you thing,” Pontius tried to smile nervously before Matthias spoke up again.
“It's good that you don't want my forgiveness, since I have none to give. Your actions are your own so it's up to you if you want to regret anything. But if your prerogative is to act like a mindless animal then you can expect to be put down like one, too. You probably could kill Russ-”
“Hey!”
“-And if you wanted you could kill me.” He thought of the dragon-girl they had met. She looked like she had been born holding her giant hammer. “But there are people stronger than you in this world. Are you really okay with dying alone in a cave in the middle of the cliffs?”
And then something Derrek had said struck Matthias. He blinked hard a few times as he considered, Irene had vanished the same time as Derrek. Derrek who now seemed to care nothing for anyone or anything. “What did you do to Irene?”
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Post by Derrek on Jul 13, 2017 7:19:29 GMT
Derrek felt like he was getting scolded by a child. He could feel what little of an ego he had start to flare up. His near instant reaction was to retaliate and tell Matthias that he had no place to lecture Derrek, but he was no longer a kid. Not only that, but maybe Derrek did deserve to be scolded. If his intention was to anger or hurt Derrek, it was certainly working.
Voice raised again, he retorted. “If I didn’t care for anyone, WHY would I have bothered to help you? To look for you? Why would I have given up Irene and the kids so I could LOOK FOR YOU if I didn’t care for anyone?” He was so unsure of how to stress it to Matthias that he did care and, admittedly, still did. The very first time he had assumed Matthias was dead destroyed his spirit.
When Matthias mentioned that Derrek could kill him and Russ, he could have sworn he felt his heart stop for a second. Did he really appear that awful? Sure, he’d killed a lot of people, but most of the time it was because they simply wouldn’t leave Derrek be. The only expressions easily conveyed in his half-form was anger, but in the case of shock and disappointment, his bulky wings drooped ever so slightly.
He was simply at a loss for words, hurt by the idea that Matthy would even bring up something like that. “Why would you think I’d ever even consider doing something as horrid as that?” He wanted to add ‘or anyone you cared about’, but Derrek would have kicked Russ out of the cave if he hadn’t known that he was Matthias’ lover. His voice was strewn with emotion, different from the anger he had felt just a moment ago. “I didn’t take you in and try to help you get away from your slave life just so I would try to kill you.” The fact was, Derrek still knew very, very little about anything that Matthias dealt with as a slave. “And what makes you think I hold myself so high that I think I’m invincible? I know damn well that there are plenty of other people out there that can kill me. Fuck, most of the things that live in the cliffs can overpower me.” It was hard to kill Derrek in his true form, but not impossible.
Derrek found himself irked about the question regarding Irene. It was hard to read anything with the lack of emotion in the boy’s tone of voice, but it almost felt like there was some form of accusation there, or a sneaking suspicion of Derrek killing her. “I didn’t hurt or kill her, if that’s what you’re assuming.” He sneered and snorted another plume of steam. “You know, I have killed a lot of people, yes, but I don’t go out of my way to do it. Irene left when I stopped visiting her because I was obsessed with trying to find you.” He paused and looked away, uncomfortable with all the emotions he felt. There was so much anger mixed in with sadness and even some annoyance. Fuck, he was totally failing at keeping everything in check and just continuing to play the asshole. But did he really want to play that part with Matthy there?
“How was I supposed to know you were with Rosalind though? I suppose that means I didn’t look hard enough.” Derrek wanted to laugh at himself, but he at least managed to not do that. If Matthy had been there so often as he said, then the dragon shifter really was a goddamn failure at everything he tried to do.
All of this was so emotionally taxing and it’d been so long since Derrek really even spoke to anyone, months even. He looked out the cave entrance where the rain was still pouring and cloud still booming. He almost felt like he preferred his chances out there than dealing with…whatever was happening inside the cave. There was silence, just for a moment, and Derrek found himself beaten. There was no excuse for any of the things he’d done, but there was no benifet in regretting it either. Hazel eyes shinning dangerously he took one step toward Matthias. “If you really think me so past redemption,” he started, not taking his eyes off of Matthias for a second. “Then kill me yourself.” He nodded at the sword in Matthias’ hand. “I no longer wish to die like I did years ago, but if you wanted to be rid of me so badly, then I’d let you do it with no ill feeling. You’d be wrong to assume I’d even try to resist if it was you that struck me down.” He was honest, and he meant it. If Matthias really hated him so much and really just thought him an animal that needed to be put down, then he was welcome to do it.
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Post by Matthias on Jul 26, 2017 10:15:41 GMT
Matthias raised his pointed chin and stared flatly at Derrek. “Did you now?” He said softly. He lowered his chin a little and he tapped his talons on the stone cave as his tail twitched and flexed the spines of his tail so they rattled softy. “Then why hasn't Rosalind seen you? She's easy to find, I hunt her down a couple times a year. If you wanted to find me – really, actually find me and not pretend like you do just to make yourself feel better about just skulking around – you would have gone to her. If Irene got fed up with you then that's because she could see through your bullshit too.” Was he supposed to feel sympathetic? Compassion? Derrek was the adult, had been the adult. Why was Matthias responsible for making him feeling better about himself?
“You just said you were okay with killing people. Why would I put anything past you?” And when Derrek reiterated that he killed people Matthias' eyes widened in an uncharacteristic display of emotion as he pointed an accusatory talon at Derrek. “You just said you murdered people, what the fuck is wrong with you!? You can angst about Irene and her kids all you want, hells you can blame me for her leaving you all you want, but frankly she would have to be an absolute lunatic to allow you around her kids.”
He was incredulous and frustrated and he felt Pontius squeeze his hand. “Uuuh, babe, please don't-”
Matthias took a deep breath.
“Oh boy.”
“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? YOU. KNOW. I. LOVE! ROSALIND! I asked her about you EVERY. FUCKING. TIME. I saw her! I don't think you looked for me at all! You just used me as an excuse to wallow in your own self riotous nihilism!” His tail smacked the cave floor and his spines rattled together so violently it sounded like a rattle snake's tail. The sound was echoed by a serpentine hiss as Anoki bristled from his hiding place.
At his next suggestion, Matthias curled his lip over his sharpened teeth and gave Derrek a look of genuine revulsion. “I'm not becoming a murderer to soothe your ego, Derrek,” Matthias said flatly. He had killed people before, yes, but they were slavers. He killed people to free slaves. Matthias hardly thought that an act of liberation counted as murder regardless of the violence involved.
Then his expression was still again. Still, calm, and completely blank. “You know what?” He said flatly, “you can do whatever you want.” Matthias moved his hands in a quick motion and withdrew Derrek's old sword and shield. It felt dirty having them on his body now. He looked down at them before he tossed them to Derrek's feet. “I'm getting out of here.”
It was raining, but not as hard as it had been and he turned, dragging Pontius with him as he stalked out to the stormy cliffs. Anoki dropped from the roof of the cave and flew after them, not sparing Derrek a second glance.
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